Thats It.

Well, today I woke up and found myself thinking different, feeling different, and overall just different than I was when I fell asleep. All of my problems felt thrown out the window, and I feel like things that are not very important, shouldn’t matter as much as I believe they do.

I guess you could say I "woke up" because technically, I did. I want to be happy and lately I feel like I have been falling far from happiness. Today, waking up in my bed, with the window wide open, felt like starting new. I went on facebook, read all of the blogs I have posted, looked and studied my profile, "in a relationship" just seemed to pop out at me today.

I guess I haven’t really been keeping my side of the relationship. Lately with all the chaos of graduating, moving out, getting a job, and especially drama class, I haven’t been able to fully give everything I have to this person, which I care very much about. This morning that feels as if it has all changed. For breakfast I ate a hamburger. I know I know, everyone who reads this is going to be like WHAT A HAMBURGER BUT U DON'T EAT MEAT?

Well fuck it.

A part of me wanted to be a vegetarian for the animals, save the animals blah blah blah, but in reality, what are we really doing? They still kill the same amount of cows, nothings going to change if one person decides they are no longer going to eat meat. If the rest of the world decided they weren’t going to eat meat well, that would be another story.

The other part of me did it for the healthy part of it all. Yes its healthy, I mean.. I did loose 15pounds (probably off my ass). So I figured since i'm not really getting into this whole vegetarian thing, i’m going to create a diet for myself, a proper one.

Its not that I disliked not eating meat, I actually enjoyed not having to. Haha that probably sounds weird... I would make my own meals, decide what I was going to eat for dinner, and have it. I wouldn’t have to cook for everyone. I want to keep that up. Cooking for myself gave me time to think and just enjoy life. Wow that sounds so corny.

Anyways, today i’m going to go out. I’m not sure where, but i’m going to go. I feel good, happy, excited, haha I just want to drive and listen to music so loud that my ear drums pop out of my skull.


New life is such a beautiful thing.